Blaming Oneself

Posted on Mon Nov 6th, 2023 @ 7:09pm by Captain Taiga Aisaka & Lieutenant Commander Ryuuji Takasu

1,675 words; about a 8 minute read

Mission: Starship Graveyard
Location: Captains Quarters

Taiga entered her quarters that evening to find it a complete mess. The crash had dislodged everything, and it would take hours if not days to clean and tidy it all up. She simply let out a large sigh, this wasn't what she needed at all.

"I gathered it would be a mess..." Ryuuji said from behind her. Taiga nodded as she made her way over towards the overutned glass table and picked up a photo of her and Ryuuji from their wedding. She was glad that the glass in the frame hadn't cracked and it had remained intact. Smiling she took it to the window and placed it on the windowsill.

She brushed a cushion on the couch clear before taking a seat. "I really can't be bothered with all this right now." She sighed. She unzipped her red tunic and threw it lazily on one of the adjacent chairs. Ryuuji smiled as he made his way over to her, gently he sat down next to her and put a reassuring arm around her.

"Go on Taiga. Tell me whats on your mind?"

"Nothing. It's just been one hell of a day thats all..." Taiga claimed. She avoided eye contact with him, pretending to take notice of the broken replicator which was flickering over in the kitchen area.

"Oh no you don't. I can tell when something is up with you!" Ryuuji replied as he squeezed her a little harder. That was his way of telling her that he was there to listen and that she could confide in him.

"You do know me too well..." Taiga sighed. "Well, once again I've messed up!"

"Oh? How have you messed up?"

"Have you seen where we are right now?" Taiga snapped back. Her sudden burst of anger was quickly changed with tears as they started to flow down her face. "I don't know if all this is because of the baby, but I feel like I just need to cry right now" she sniffled. She turned and buried her face into Ryuuji, as she audible sobbed into him.

"First I nearly get us all killed by the Elachi. Then my XO goes and blows up a station! I get captured by the very same Elachi, and make you all worried. Next I take us to a dangerous nebula, launch all those men and women out in their fighters. They disappear, and then I crash us on this bloody planet!" she couldn't keep the tears from coming now, they were flowing out of her like a waterfall.

"And to top it all off! Two other women on this ship are having children! How can I expect them to have their children in such a place! We might not survive and its not fair on those little innocent babies to go through this!"

Ryuuji was listening closely as he held her close with one hand, and used the other to pet her hair. He ran his finger through her sandy coloured hair to rassure her and to comfort her the best way he could. "Its not your fault Taiga. You had no idea we would end up come crashing down on this horrible planet."

"But I knew that ships had gone missing! I knew that! When we saw the planet I should have put two and two together!" Taiga sobbed, her voice slightly muffled by Ryuuji's uniform. She reached up and gripped his uniform with both hands. "I should have backed us off. We're not a damn science ship! We aren't equipped for this, we're a rapid response carrier..."

Ryuuji still ran his fingers through her hair as she spoke softly to her. "You did what you can Taiga. There's no need to feel guilty for all of this. We might be here a while. Yeah, I know it sucks. But, we'll make the most of it. I swear I won't let anyone come between us. Plus, you know I made a promise to protect you and our precious child you are carrying. I fully intend to keep that promise."

Taiga looked up at Ryuuji and stared into his deep dark eyes. "You sure..." she sobbed. For now the tyears had subsided, but her nose was still slightly runny and she was still feeling guilty and upset for her actions.

Ryuuji nodded. "Taiga..." he said as he wiped the tears from her face. "You know that I love you more than anything else in this damn universe. When I make a promise to you I keep it. Until the day I die." He gently moved a hand down and placed it on her belly. Since her pregnancy Taiga had taken to wearing the cropped version of the undershirts. She had worn them before, but had discovered now that her belly had started to grow it was easier than constantly replicating bigger undershirts. Plus is allowed more movement and made it easier for medical to conduct maternity scans.

"This baby is precious, not just to you, but also to me. I made that promise to protect you as my wife, my soulmate and the woman who is bringing my son or daughter into this harsh world." He kissed her lightly on the forehead. "So, promise me you will do your best to do what needs to be done. We will get off the planet and we will have this child together and raise them in a safe place." He held his head high proudly as if looking at a something in the distance. It was like he was imagining a far away house, which had become their home. It would be surrounded by green grass, have children playing outside and smoke rising from the chimney. It was the perfect family home one would usually see in children's books. That image is what Ryuuji was seeing in his mind, not a crashed Starship on a desert planet.

Taiga continued to look into his eyes. She could see the pure desire and determination in them. She could feel his hand holding her bare belly, as if protecting the child which grew within her. Slowly she pushed away from him, returning to a sitting position. Ryuuji's arm returned to being back around her shoulder whilst his other still stayed on her exposed belly.

"You do like saying hello don't you..." Taiga sniffled referring to his hand.

Ryuuji laughed. "Well, I have always wanted a child. I just can't help by being protective." He said as he removed his hand from her belly. He was about to get up off the sofa to start cleaning up the room. However Taiga reached out and grabbed him by the arm.

"Ryuuji..." she said.

"Huh? What is it Taiga?" he asked. He had that littlw twinkle in his eyes that he got when something needed cleaning. The itch to get the room sorted out was starting to become too much for him to handle.

She pulled him back down and guided his hand back to her belly. She placed it back on her exposed skin. "I like it. I don't know how much time we have if we never get off this planet..." She said as she blushed slightly. "Please, spend as much time with him/her as you can."

Ryuuji closed his eyes for a brief moment to gather his thoughts. Although Taiga was being very negative about getting off the planet, he did appreciate that she was thinking about him and the baby that grew within her womb. "Taiga," he said as he began to gently rub her belly. "I have no intention of dying here, and I will ensure this baby is well looked after. We will get off this planet one way or another. And I will show this baby the beauty and wonderful things in this universe. I will protect them from the dangers and I will ensure that both of you come with me every step. So, lets focus on escaping this place and being the family I know we can be."

Taiga smiled as she looked at Ryuuji, he seemed to be staring off in the distance. She reached up and turned his face towards him. She then pulled him down by the collar and kissed him passionately. "You can be such a hopeless romantic you know. But I accept your promise. We will get off this planet and make sure our lives continue on."

She let him go as she stared out of the window for a moment. "I guess I was being dramatic again?"

"You can't help it... I mean you are pregnant. It messes with you..." Ryuuji stated. He didn't want to be the cause for them losing another baby, especially since the one that Taiga was currently carrying was a miracle in itself. The last thing he wanted was for a night of pleasure to be the reason their happiness was shattered.

Taiga turned to look at Ryuuji again. "It also makes me want to do more things you know..." she said as she gave him a rather flirty look. "You know what I mean..." she held out her hands like claws as if she was about to tickle him. "Come on Ryuuji... what do you say..."

"Taiga, I don't think this is the time for that..." Ryuuji said as he began to back away. That didn't help as Taiga sprung off the couch and threw herself on him. There was an almighty clatter as he fell to the floor, Taiga now sitting on him holding him down. "I could make it an order you know..."

Ryuuji swallowed. "Taiga..." he said, he had never seen her wanting it this badly. "Whats got into you?!"

A creepy perverted smile spread across Taiga's face. "Maybe its this planet, maybe its the baby in my belly. However I want you tonight Ryuuji Takasu! And I fully intend to have you!" she told him. "What is it the Borg say... Resistance is Futile...."

Posting by

Captain Taiga Aisaka
Commanding Officer

Lieutenant Commander Ryuuji Takasu
Chief Strategic Operations Officer

RSS Feed